14th
Emotional Labor: Quite possibly the most under-rated professional tool today
I’m currently in the process of reading Seth Godin’s “Linchpin: Are You Indispensable”. One of the more thought provoking concepts that Seth addresses is the concept called Emotional Labor. Emotional Labor includes the interactions between individuals, including co-workers, clients, superiors, etc. Emotional Labor can involve connecting with others, flashing a smile, taking initiative, showing charisma, solving a problem.
It’s important that emotional labor isn’t a concept that takes physical skills. What it does take is a ton of effort. It’s very tiring for almost everyone.
Because it takes so much effort, and it’s not a hard skill (especially things like connecting with others, charisma, asking questions, smiling), nearly everyone I know just forgets it altogether. It’s easy to think it doesn’t help perform day to day aspects of a job, and because it’s tiring, pass on it altogether.
But emotional labor is a real low-hanging fruit. I believe that very few individuals - either at home or work - are really mastering this skill. As Seth points out, as it becomes almost impossible to produce a cheaper widget in the era of Wal-Mart & Amazon, emotional labor may be the only way to differentiate.
How does one improve in this area? I’d suggest to begin to think about those in your own life that do a good job at this and think about what they are doing. You should have 1 or 2 folks, past or present, that you can think of. I can think of a friend in college that I’d get lunch with once in a while. He brought so much energy into those conversations, so much engagement. Always asking questions, smiling, eye contact, not checking the phone. We grew closer because his approach to our conversations required interaction, intimacy, and intellectuality. I left those conversations feeling filled with life, recharged. I’ve got another friend who, when he shows up, brings so much charisma into a room it comes to life. There is an energy he brings with his positive attitude, jokes, overall energy.
In both these examples, there is a good amount of intention - questions, attitude, facial expressions, presence. My guess is it’s not easy to bring that much energy into conversations or charisma into a room, but they’ve realized it’s worth the effort for them. And it’s under their control.
These are things I’m going to begin thinking more about in my own personal and professional life. Especially how can I encourage those I manage to bring emotional labor into our client relationships to create a competitive advantage.
